It was just a annoying Monday morning. I woke up as planned at about eight and I got up as usual around ten. I went out to send off my visa extension application. Well, the whole process of getting all supporting documents for visa extension had been painful. It wasn't supposed to be but everything just had some extra hassle added. Anyway I was just glad it was over.
I went home after picked three huge bags of supplies for next two weeks. I then just realised that I forgot to buy rice. That meant pasta for tonight. I turned on my laptop. I really should write something in my thesis that I had to finish by the end of February. But before I started, I thought I'd blog a little. It had been over a week since my last post. I let my mind to wander, trying to figure out some easy topic. There were quite a few I could moan about. And right at that time, someone popped up in my MSN. Someone I haven't heard from for three years. We chatted for a while and I wished him a good new year at the end. Then, I couldn't help myself to write something about him.
We never met in person but only on the internet. It was the gay society on the internet. It was early 2003, if I recalled correctly. The awareness of homosexuals were just started back then in China. It was a forum that we hung out a lot. It was great fun. Right before I was about to come to UK. He told me he was about to marry a girl. When I asked why, his reply was just simple and just Chinese: for my mother.
It would an extremely bizarre reason for most of the people in other parts of the world. But for Chinese, that's what we do. Nothing could we put beyond our family, and our parents are one of the most important parts of it. It is impossible to explain this in a few words so I will just leave it here. Anyway, I told him and if I were him I wouldn't but he did anyway. They had a happy wedding, a few months latter.
About another few months latter, I was still struggling to get used to the life in UK, I met him again on MSN. He told me that he didn't use MSN that much. He was happy about everything back there. He was very good to his wife, in the way that any good husband could possibly be. He also told me that he had a boyfriend somewhere else. They met occasionally. He said everything was just working out. I wasn't so convinced though. But that's his life and that's what he wanted.
Then it had been three years. I never heard from him in these three years and I doubted if he would ever appear again. It might just be the Christmas spirit playing tricks and there he was on MSN here. He said hi. He said he just had a baby girl ten days ago. They gave the girl a very beautiful name. He said he was so happy and he was indeed a good husband. He didn't fool around outside anymore, and he had told everything about his homosexual history to his wife. His wife probably got the promise that it was just the past and he was just a family man now. I wouldn't know. We couldn't talk more because it was late in China at the moment we were chatting and his baby girl was crying. But I guessed that somehow his wife accepted it and forgived him. It might be the evidence of true love without border or just a sacrifice for the family made by a woman. I have no intelligence to comment at all. But I could see he was really happy.
Normally I would be judging him now but I decided not to. I did't even want to comment as such. It was just something I thought like to make a note on my journal, if I had one.
I went home after picked three huge bags of supplies for next two weeks. I then just realised that I forgot to buy rice. That meant pasta for tonight. I turned on my laptop. I really should write something in my thesis that I had to finish by the end of February. But before I started, I thought I'd blog a little. It had been over a week since my last post. I let my mind to wander, trying to figure out some easy topic. There were quite a few I could moan about. And right at that time, someone popped up in my MSN. Someone I haven't heard from for three years. We chatted for a while and I wished him a good new year at the end. Then, I couldn't help myself to write something about him.
We never met in person but only on the internet. It was the gay society on the internet. It was early 2003, if I recalled correctly. The awareness of homosexuals were just started back then in China. It was a forum that we hung out a lot. It was great fun. Right before I was about to come to UK. He told me he was about to marry a girl. When I asked why, his reply was just simple and just Chinese: for my mother.
It would an extremely bizarre reason for most of the people in other parts of the world. But for Chinese, that's what we do. Nothing could we put beyond our family, and our parents are one of the most important parts of it. It is impossible to explain this in a few words so I will just leave it here. Anyway, I told him and if I were him I wouldn't but he did anyway. They had a happy wedding, a few months latter.
About another few months latter, I was still struggling to get used to the life in UK, I met him again on MSN. He told me that he didn't use MSN that much. He was happy about everything back there. He was very good to his wife, in the way that any good husband could possibly be. He also told me that he had a boyfriend somewhere else. They met occasionally. He said everything was just working out. I wasn't so convinced though. But that's his life and that's what he wanted.
Then it had been three years. I never heard from him in these three years and I doubted if he would ever appear again. It might just be the Christmas spirit playing tricks and there he was on MSN here. He said hi. He said he just had a baby girl ten days ago. They gave the girl a very beautiful name. He said he was so happy and he was indeed a good husband. He didn't fool around outside anymore, and he had told everything about his homosexual history to his wife. His wife probably got the promise that it was just the past and he was just a family man now. I wouldn't know. We couldn't talk more because it was late in China at the moment we were chatting and his baby girl was crying. But I guessed that somehow his wife accepted it and forgived him. It might be the evidence of true love without border or just a sacrifice for the family made by a woman. I have no intelligence to comment at all. But I could see he was really happy.
Normally I would be judging him now but I decided not to. I did't even want to comment as such. It was just something I thought like to make a note on my journal, if I had one.
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